300

March 23, 2007 at 6:54 pm (blog)

Watching the film 300 will leave most men older than 30, “Persian” or not, feeling rather paunchy. A phalanx of Spartans composed of a bunch Abercrombie & Fitch models, takes on the brutal “Persians” — a group with a lower life expectancy than the Iraqi police — with little more than steely will and impressive six-packs. The so-called Persians are in contrast, a porky horde, and useless fighters. So flimsy is their archery, that the Spartans raise their shields to fend off a sky full of arrows like Englishmen in bowler hats holding brolleys against the rain.

Now, of course, you don’t have to be a historian to know that back in the day, the last things the Spartans, being spartan, had was CGI graphics to tone themselves with (although some it is said did have PlayStation II). But this is Hollywood make-believe at its best. Or racist worst. The Lord Of The Rings meets King Kong‘s Skull Island. I mean, something can be so outrageously racist it merits a dedicated Oscar category. It can be a blacked-up statuette. In fact, throw in a Borat Part II, Midnight Express The Return and The Passion of Christ Resurrected and we can have a racist film festival called The Sambos. Director Zack Snyder would surely feel at home. His film’s hero, Leonidas, the Belgian chocolate-maker, dies in a Crucifixion-inspired pose, leaving the cinema-goers to mourn, apart from anything else, those hard-earned abs and pecs. The message is clear: “The brutal, dark, harem-dwelling Orientals killed Our Boys. Let’s bomb the coons.” To give credit where it’s due, however, the film has accomplished something remarkable. It has managed to unite Iranians living in the West — not since the publication of Not Without My Daughter in 1988 has a representation of Iranians been so roundly condemned. Not without reason.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: