God bless America

December 5, 2006 at 8:50 pm (Espresso)

Am in San Jose. A new housing development with a gym. Friend’s. Outside it is sunny, just spent 45 mins on jogging machine. Wasn’t jogging, but it’s enough to stand in one spot sometimes. I do that with books in bookshops — stroke them, without reading them. Cannot upload photos at the moment. In fact, have had communications issues since I entered this country. Starting at US passort control in Vancouver. Got the full “Are you a Mozlim” treatment. Fortunately my non-Muslim credentials are intact. But what if I was? Hmm. This exchange actually took place:

“Where were you born?”
“Tehran.”
“Are you Hindu?”

Sparky was trying to elicit the defensive response “No, I am a Muslim.” Then he pointed me to the back room.

“My colleagues will ask you a few questions because you were born in Iran.”

Sparky I
“Are you a Muslim?”
“Er, no.”
“You’re not a Muslim?”
“No.”
“Do you practice any religion.”
“I dabble with Catholicism. I like communion wafers. Also, I suffer guilt, which I suppose makes me Jewish.”

Sparky II
“Will you be working in the United States?”
“Yes, for Wal-Mart. Nothing like low wages and no medical insurance. The company offers employees a sweater after 25 years of service. Oh, and there’s the 10 per cent store discount.

Sparky III
“What is the reason for your visit to the US?”
“There is a religion that believes in the arrival of a fifth Beatle, I am the Iranian reincarnation of Stuart Sutcliffe.”

Sparky II again
“You’re not a Mozlim?”
“Not according to my Rabbi?”
“You have a Rabbi?”
“Yeah, I took him hostage.”

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6 Comments

  1. ahmad shafii said,

    Not bad for the time being; but remember that your father is Hadi Khorsandi and the Iranian poeple expect you a lot/Ahmad

  2. Niall said,

    Did they not go for the full cavity search at this point? Have you sat down since?

  3. AA said,

    You are having too much fun in US of A!
    Keep the jokes coming…

  4. zaneirani said,

    Loved it… the one with Wal-Mart is that Shohreh Aghadshlou’s inter. with you!

    Tops 🙂

  5. rb said,

    Mark Twain observed humor is the one true power humanity possesses. You have proven again that is so…

  6. aMmAr said,

    nice one !! 😀

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