Soccer update
By the SBC sport desk: Those with only a vague interest in the World Cup may be interested to know that Iran, Ghana and Brazil are no longer in the running. Iran was knocked out by France tonight in a match where Zinadine Zidane kicked a ball many times. Ghana did not make it to the finals, which surprised many. Brazil never stood a chance. Its ball-kickers can now expect to return to their soccer-mad Islamic country to be, er, kicked in the balls. England invented the sport and postage stamps. Television, which everyone depends on to watch soccer, was invented by the Scots who are not so good at football.
Beautiful game
A football match is the only time when straight men can break down and cry with no fear of being called gay.
They caress each other’s faces, wipe sweat from brows, and kiss with no care for what some might say.
Short
Iran president’s popularity by Ali Mashangian: A recent opinion poll suggests that Iran’s president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is increasingly popular among Western journalists. Professor Jim Houriyeslami at the University of Tehran grew up with him. He says: “Even when we were working-class children in the streets of South Tehran, Mahmoud [Ahmadinejad] felt an affinity with journalists. And this is why journalists like him so much, they feel he is one of them. Moronically disposed towards a self-serving and simplistic view of the world – it really strikes a chord.”
Mike Earnest, editor of Paris-based journal Le Crap and an expert on Iranian affairs, agrees: “President Ahmadinejad, if you forgive his anti-semitism, is actually a cheeky reporter at heart. He is a complete and utter fool – and that is why we love him.”
Iranian people, however, remain baffled by their president’s popularity with the foreign press. Homa Kargar, a university lecturer was ‘retired’ after Ahmadinejad’s election last year. “I was hardly kicking the bucket,” says the 37-year-old. She works three jobs and says “I still fail to make ends meet for my family.” Kargar adds that she is “surprised but also not surprised” at the reception Ahmadinejad is getting from the press. “We saw it with that ‘reformer’ Khatami,” she says. “They loved him. And they said it was we who loved him. Now, they love Ahmadinejad. And they say it is we who love him. And if we say that we do not, the government strikes us with batons and journalists hit us
with polls.”
PRESS RELEASE
From the Israel Defense Forces : ”And the Lord said thou shalt build bridges with the people of Gaza. But the people of Gaza taketh one of our mighty men. And thus the Lord said destroy the bridges of Gaza. And Lo! We destroyed the bridges of the Gaza-ites. Let your tanks and aircraft cast a pall over the whole of Gazaland, said the Lord. And Lo! Our tanks shelled and Our aircraft bombed and the Gaza-ites were thus deprived of sleep. And electricty. And running water. So probably was our soldier.”
